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- What are the most common reasons/issues you see during divorce proceedings for young Muslims?
What are the most common reasons/issues you see during divorce proceedings for young Muslims?
Number one is the families get involved. You have husband's family, wife's family, all getting into this and basically saying that we spent all this money on the marriage. We did this for you. You didn't do this for us. And so that drama from the family will make a simple divorce much, much more because of everybody's pride.
A lot of things I see in young Muslim marriages is that they don't know how to confront each other.
They don't know how to talk. They don't know how to express their feelings. They've gotten whatever they needed from their parents and they've given them whatever they wanted. So much so that basically their parents have run their life and now when they're independent and they have to deal with a problem, they have to deal with a miscommunication or some issue between husband and wife, they're unable to work it through like a mature human being and actually talk it through.
Rather as soon as somebody says no to them, or somebody offends them they think I can't handle this. I'm going to file for divorce.
So that's the second thing is that we're quick to divorce. We do not have the emotional intelligence to work through many of these problems and understanding that marriage is hard work. That there's going to be struggle. That you have to work through things.
The third thing I would say is we have intimacy issues as well. We have many men who are addicted to watching things online.
We have many women who believe that marriage is supposed to look like how it looks on Instagram and in the videos or in the movies. And so we don't have a realistic view of what marriage looks like. So that's kind of the problems I see in young Muslims, especially people who are getting divorced in the first year or two.